Tomorrow will mark the seventh day since Hamas massacred civilians in Israel. In Judaism, after a person passes away, a formal mourning period of seven days, known as shiva, is observed by the immediate family of the deceased. So, tomorrow, Shabbat will be the end of a sort of shiva period for the wider Jewish community, because it feels as if we all lost family seven days ago.
But while shiva is the most well-known of the mourning periods in Judaism, there are others. Sheloshim is the first 30 days of mourning, and Shanah is an 11-month period after Sheloshim that is observed if it is a parent who passed away. All of that to say, Judaism has long recognized that loss does not end on a specific timeline and offered guidance on how to proceed.
With the recent losses, it feels as if we are lacking guidance. This is an unimaginable loss that has been suffered by Jews across the world. I have tried to find caring voices and communities both online and in-person to process the past week. Today, again, I joined thousands at a rally in DC to listen to politicians, ambassadors, clergy, and community representatives recognize our losses and advocate for peace.
But, while traveling by metro and sitting in the audience, I also juggled messages from friends and family asking about my whereabouts and safety. Why? Because I’m Jewish, and Hamas called for a day of rage against Jews across the globe that led many institutions to close out of an abundance of caution. In DC, with closed streets around us and a clear police presence, we rallied in safety, but it was never a sure thing, it never is. And that is where much of the pain of these past seven days comes from. The lack of recognition, by so many, of the constant fear of violence Jews carry, no matter where they inhabit the world. This obliviousness to the daily experience of Jews only adds to the pain and misunderstanding that seems to surround the recent violence in Israel.
As Jews, we are supposed to take seven days to mourn, and offered another thirty, another year. But the world barely gave us a few hours to mourn those who had been lost before the internet, the media, the activists arrived to talk over us about politics and virtue when we just wanted to remember our dead.
I thank the speakers, the likes of Governor Wes Moore, Congressman Jamie Raskin, ambassadors from Germany, Hungary, Britain, France, Italy, and Israelis who shared the stories of their families and communities, who gave us a space to come together and feel cared for today. But that is not a universal feeling, it is only a small space that has been offered. We take our strength and empathy where we can find it though. As Representative Raskin said, “When everything looks hopeless, you are the hope.”
Shabbat Shalom. May we all find some peace and rest here, seven days onward.